I promise I haven't forgotten about having a blog.  Every time I sit down to write a story or update I just stare at the screen.  I finally decided that I would share with you some of the people that have been on my heart a lot lately.  Some of the people who I have been praying for and that in so many ways have rocked my faith by getting to walk with them on this journey.  

School has been back in session for almost two months and some of my little friends are having trouble focusing in school or learning their lessons.  Each of them love school and they want to be there.  It's just hard.  It's hard going from an environment of little structure to one that is completely structured and in a different language (school is taught in French).  It's hard learning (and remembering) lessons when you haven't eaten yet that day and possibly only ate once the day before.  And it's hard for the mommas, grandmas, and caregivers to help the kids with their homework when sometimes they are unable to read and write themselves.  So one of my prayers has been for the school children to be blessed with parents/caregivers who are daily encouraging the kids to learn and study.  That the parents are blessed with work in order to provide for their families.  And that the children would be able to focus while in school and that their little minds would be able to learn what is needed in order to continue progressing in school.  

Esaie is in the malnutrition program and has an amazing momma.  She is always quick to help teach and encourage the other mothers at appointments and calls me (sometimes daily) with updates.  This momma has other children that are doing well and she has said multiple times that Esaie has struggled since he was little with one sickness after another.  There was a point in our relationship though that she literally rocked my world.  In normal conversation she simply stated that if Esaie is still alive in December he will be two years old.  My heart literally dropped the moment I heard the words "if Esaie is still alive" come out of her mouth.  My instant response was out of anger that she would even think about him dying over the next few months.  After I took a few breaths though I was filled with compassion for this momma.  She has been fighting for this little guy from the day he was born.  She has chosen to fight for him even when the dad left, when they didn't have a home or roof over their heads, and when he has had sickness after sickness.  This momma has still chosen to love her son but in reality she also knows just how frail and sick he is.  This momma was being honest with me and it was in that moment that I knew I had to pray for wisdom in knowing how to love and encourage her.  When admitting a child into the malnutrition program I never know if it's the parent/caregiver or the child that I'm really being called to serve.  Yes, the child has immediate medical needs but sometimes it has so much more to do with learning to meet that parent right where they are in the mess of life and letting them know that its ok to fight and keep going.

 Kerley has had a special spot in my heart for quite awhile.  If' I'm being honest though it's his momma that has truly captured my heart and that has been the one I have felt such a huge burden to pray for.  Kerley has many medical problems that have caused him to be malnourished and very developmentally delayed.  In order for this momma to to care for Kerley she must be in the home with him.  She is such a sweet momma with this little guy and truly loves him.  And yet, if she is at home with Kerley she is unable to work and earn an income.  If she doesn't work outside the home then she isn't able to care for her other children which means that she is unable to send them to school and provide for their needs.  No matter what this momma does or chooses she is not caring for someone in her family.  Kerley's momma has been very open with me in seeking advice and wisdom on what would be best for not only Kerley but her entire family.  We have cried and prayed together multiple times and I'm always left feeling torn for this momma.  My prayers have been for this momma to have a support system that would step up to love and serve her well.  That she would be blessed with an opportunity to work so she can provide for all of her children.  I don't know what any of that looks like and yet I know that we serve a very big God and that none of this mommas story is too small for Him.  Praying with and for this momma has challenged me in so many ways.

Sweet Fado rocked the world of myself and several other of my nurse friends over a year ago when he was initially diagnosed with severe malnutrition.  It's never easy walking with a momma on this journey and this story was filled with lots of ups and downs.  Fado was recently re-admitted into the malnutrition program.  My heart breaks for this little guy.  In the worst way I want to see him thriving and reaching developmental milestones like a normal two year old.  Oh how I want to see this little one not only learn to walk but run and cause all sorts of trouble.  I want to see this momma empowered to fight for her son. In so many ways I'm also fighting against the desire to hide and pretend like Fado isn't as sick as he is and just how messy that can make relationships.  So one of my big prayers has been that I would be bold and willing to be firm and fight for Fado.  Another prayer has been for wisdom in knowing how to care for Fado and how to love and encourage his sweet momma.   

I feel honored to have been given a spot in each of my kiddos little lives.  Each of them is such a blessing in a different and unique way.  These children are the future of not only Chambrun but of Haiti.  I'm constantly praying for wisdom in learning how to best walk alongside their families.  I desire to see these children loved and encouraged in their homes.  And oh how I want to see each of them get to go to school and do well in school.  I pray for each of the programs that NVM has for the children from Brigade (Boy/Girl scout, AWANA type of activity), youth group, choir, Sunday school, and others- that these programs would be a safe place for the children to grow in their relationships with the Lord.  I'm also constantly praying for patience and energy (for some reason the kids never lack energy..) as I learn to love and serve each child in the way that s/he needs most.  These children have blessed me in ways they will never even know and I consider it a honor to get to pray for them and to live life with them.